Thoughts on the Ordain Women Movement

Ok there are six million other things I should be doing right now but I have been pondering on this subject for some time and I have to write it all out before my brain explodes!

My thoughts on Ordain Women and other feminist movements with in the church:

1.       I wish people would stop hurting one another! I don’t care if you agree or not can we all just please have a kind discourse about this issue! Telling others they are stupid for what they believe, calling them the anti-Christ, telling them to leave the church is only tearing us apart! Pres. Utchdorf said in his amazing talk last conference: “I plead with all who hear or read these words: Come, join with us. Come heed the call of the gentle Christ. Take up your cross and follow Him.^12”

We of all people should never tell people just to “go away”. We need all of our brothers and sisters to come join with us! (PS, read that whole talk, it’s amazing). When reading the scriptures I’ve noticed how amazing it is that Christ is ALWAYS telling us to come unto Him and that He will turn away none who want to come to Him! We need to follow his example and open our hearts to all despite differences in opinions! So please can we stop getting so angry at each other and name calling? If we take time to truly LISTEN to one another we will truly LEARN.

2.       Please, let’s validate each other’s feelings instead of sweeping them aside. This is for both sides. Women who feel they want the priesthood need to be understood, and we need to listen to what they have to say and why they feel that way. I feel like as I’ve tried to approach the subject with an open mind, I have learned tons! And I am actually so grateful for them because even if I don’t see eye to eye in everything, they are helping us think harder about equality, about the culture of the church and what may be wrong with it. I’m so happy women are now praying in conference! I’m ecstatic about the changes made in missions to allow women more leadership positions! If we actually listen to how these and all women feel, we can learn so much on how to better our world, culture, church, whatever. On the other hand, women who don’t feel the same need to be understood as well.   Women, like myself, who “feel equal” don’t need to be told that their feelings are invalid. To say that equality is not a feeling, makes all of us who do feel equal feel like we are being brushed aside into a box of “you’re not intelligent enough to know if you are equal or not so just be quiet.” Yeah. Ouch. Even if it is not intended that way, which I’m sure it’s not, that is how it feels. So on both sides, we need to put down our defensiveness and really listen and consider the other’s point of view rather than rolling your eyes or brushing thoughts and feelings aside.

3.       Should women be ordained or not? Well I still haven’t figured that one out! From my understanding of the gospel now, I feel like the answer is no. But God is much much bigger than me and understands so much more than I do. And I TRUST HIM. If tomorrow President Monson comes out and says “OKAY! Let’s ordain the women!” I will trust. Some may say “Oh that will never happen” but I’m sure Nephi probably never dreamed he’d be asked to kill a man in cold blood. If it never happens that women are ordained I will trust. I trust God. I know that his idea of equality may look different than ours. Because even though we think we are smart stuff sometimes our brains are finite and we can’t always understand everything he does. I know that the men he has called to be his prophets and apostles are not perfect but are called of him, and I trust that they are praying, pondering and seeking revelation on the topic. I trust God to speak through them. I trust that they are not chauvinist, but are men of God seeking to put aside any cultural beliefs and focus on doctrine. If women are to be ordained, it will happen. If not, it won’t. And I trust that.

4.       Let’s keep the discussion going. Let’s not stomp out questioning and doubt by saying it is apostasy. I have learned more about my role as a woman, my Heavenly Mother, the priesthood, and God Himself as I’ve pondered and prayed about these questions and discussions. I am ever so grateful for them. If we dismiss every different-than-the-mainstream-Mormon idea that comes along we are missing so many learning opportunities. Our whole religion started from a question. Please, let’s keep asking questions, keep thinking deeply, keep our hearts and minds open to be led by the spirit, and most of all keep loving one another and being kind despite our differences in beliefs! 

Trusting in Him

Psalms 118:8
"It is better to trust in the Lord than to put confidence in man."

There are so many unanswered questions for me out there, and a future that I could potentially always be worrying about. I get overwhelmed with all the possible what ifs and whys that tumble around in my head sometimes. But then I hear a voice telling my mind to be still, and know that He is in charge.

With my questions I remember the scripture in Proverbs 3:5 "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding." I realize I need to trust, with all my heart. My understanding is so limited and finite that I need desperately to lean on him and trust that He sees the bigger picture.

Another scripture I love: Psalms 112: 7 "He shall not be afraid of evil tidings; His heart is fixed, trusting in the Lord.

I want to be like that! I want that much confidence and trust in the Lord and His plan! When all the what ifs try to creep into my mind, I want to remember I don't need to be afraid of bad news or things going wrong, I just need to constantly trust the Lord.

Another beautiful scripture: Psalms 37:4-5 "Delight thyself also in the Lord, and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart; commit thy way unto the Lord; trust also in Him; and he shall bring it to pass."

I love this scripture as well. The Lord knows my heart, he knows my hopes and desires. And if I make Him my all, and commit myself to him, and trust him, he will bless me. Such a simple reminder that He really does want to bless me with the desires of my heart. Sometimes I forget that His goal is my happiness and salvation. I am truly his daughter and just as I want to bless my children and help them be happy, he surely wants that for me. I need to remember He is not a distant dictator but a loving, close Father in Heaven.

In searching on this topic I found this little story that compares life to a bike ride:

At first I saw God as an observer, like my judge, keeping track of things I did wrong. This way, God would know whether I merited heaven or hell when I died. He was always out there, sort of like the President. I recognized His picture when I saw it, but I didn’t really know Him at all.

But later on, when I recognized my higher power better, it seemed as though life was rather like a bike ride, on a tandem bike, and I noticed God was in the back helping me pedal.

I don’t know when it was that He suggested we change places, but life has not been the same since. . . .

When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring but predictable. It was always the shortest distance between the points.

But when He took the lead, He knew delightful cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places and at breakneck speeds; it was all I could do to hang on! Even though it looked like madness, He [said], “Pedal!”

I worried and became anxious, asking, “Where are you taking me?” He just laughed and didn’t answer, and I found myself starting to trust. I soon forgot my boring life and entered into the adventure, and when I’d say, “I’m scared,” He’d lean back and touch my hand.

He took me to people with gifts that I needed; gifts of healing, acceptance and joy. They gave me their gifts to take on my journey. Our journey, that is, God’s and mine.

And we were off again. He said, “Give the gifts away, they’re extra baggage, too much weight.” So I did, to the people we met, and I found that in giving I received, and still our burden was light.

I did not trust Him at first, in control of my life. I thought He’d wreck it. But He knew bike secrets, knew how to make it bend to take sharp corners, jump to clear places filled with rocks, fly to shorten scary passages.

And I’m learning to [be quiet] and pedal in the strangest places, and I’m beginning to enjoy the view and the cool breeze on my face with my delightful constant companion, my higher power.

And when I’m sure I can’t go on anymore, He just smiles and says, “Pedal . . .” [Author unknown, “The Bike Ride,” A 2nd Helping of Chicken Soup for the Soul: 101 More Stories to Open the Heart and Rekindle the Spirit (Deerfield Beach, Florida: Health Communications, 1995), 311–12; emphasis in original]

I love this little story. I want to trust my God and His plans for me. I know He loves me and wants what is best for me. And I must trust Him and keep on pedaling!

Building a Family of Faith

 President David O. McKay: “A true Mormon (or Christian) home is one in which if Christ should chance to enter, he would be pleased to linger and to rest.” ¹²

I want my home to be this way! A place of refuge and love, tranquility and shelter. I want my husband and little ones feel they will always have a safe haven in our home. I want our home to be filled with the spirit. I want our home to be filled with faith!

Faith in our family begins with trusting our Heavenly Father and His promises. We press forward despite challenges, never giving up on ourselves or our children.We teach our family to have faith in Christ by living what we know to be true. Our children learn their most powerful lessons from our faithfulness.
-LDS.ORG


I love this quote. If I want my family to be a family of faith it starts first with me. I must first live the way I know to be true. I want to be more devoted and dedicated to Christ. I have been promised that as I put Christ first, I will be blessed.

"Are the life and teachings of Jesus Christ embedded in the minds and souls of our children? Do they think about the Savior’s life when they wonder what to do in their own lives? This will be more and more important in the years ahead." -Elder Neil L. Andersen?

How can I help my children think this way? How can I better remember to think this way?

*Ask myself "What would Jesus do?" Ask my kids as well.
*Develop a stronger relationship with God and my Savior, encourage children to do so by talking about how they love them
*Point out when they are doing things that are following Jesus. Encourage them.
*Help them see that Christ suffered all things and draw correlations from their lives to His. Help them see He understands and loves them no matter what.
*Teach your children the stories of Jesus
*Testify to them and to others around you while they are watching

GOAL: Tell children the stories of Jesus and help them apply it to their life!

"What Lack I yet": Weakness and Grace

Yesterday we had our ward conference. Our sweet stake Relief Society President (president of our women's organization in our area)  gave a thought provoking talk on the story in the New Testament of the rich young man (Matt 19:16-20). In the story, the young man tells Jesus he has followed all the commandments and done all he could to do the right thing. Then he asks Jesus "What lack I yet?" Christ answers him, telling him to sell his possessions and follow Him. The young man goes away sorrowing, because he was very wealthy and no doubt that would be a difficult request. Our Relief Society president challenged us to go home and pray and ask God, "What lack I yet?"

When she gave us that invitation I laughed to myself. What lack I? EVERYTHING. I feel like I am no where near the person I should be or want to be. I could list several things that I lack. I want so much to be already perfected! There are so many ways in which I lack. "The spirit is indeed willing, but the flesh is weak" (Matt. 26:41).

Weak. That sums me up pretty well these days. Weak and tired. I want to be patient, loving, serving, balanced, yet all I end up feeling at the end of the day is weakness.

In pondering my weakness I read Jacob 4:7

  "Nevertheless, the Lord God showeth us our ^aweakness that we may know that it is by his ^bgrace, and his great condescensions unto the children of men, that we have power to do these things."

Grace. Grace is what I need. Grace is what will help me overcome what I lack. Grace will help me get up after a night of fragmented naps a little earlier than everyone else so I can have time with Him. So I can better know Him, better give Him my heart and let it be changed by Him (Alma 5:7 Note that in this verse we see it is God who changes our hearts, not ourselves. We have to let Him.)

Another verse I came across that I loved is in Doctrine and Covenants 62:1

 "Behold, and hearken, O ye elders of my church, saith the Lord your God, even Jesus Christ, your ^aadvocate, who knoweth the weakness of man and how to ^bsuccor them who are ^ctempted."

Christ, my advocate, knows my many struggles and what I lack yet. And he knows how to succor them. I so often forget that grace is available every step of the way. In every weakness His grace is what can make me stronger. I need to stop leaning on the arm of my own weak flesh and lean on Him and trust His Grace.

Every verse I read about weakness I am reminded, I am weak so that His grace can make me strong. I am weak so I can learn to depend on Him. I am weak so that I can let go of trying to do everything myself and trust Him.

Weakness, leads me to Christ.

I'm so grateful for my weakness, that humbles me and makes me look up. And I'm forever grateful for His Grace, His Grace that is there for me every single step of the way.

"Your Grace Finds Me"

Matt Redman

It's there in the newborn cry 

It's there in the light of every sunrise 

It's there in the shadows of this light 

Your great grace 

It's there on the mountaintop 

It's there in the everyday and the mundane 

There in the sorrow and the dancing 

Your great grace 

Oh, such grace 

From the creation to the cross 

Then from the cross into eternity 

Your grace finds me 

Yes, Your grace finds me 

It's there on a wedding day 

There in the weeping by the graveside 

There in the very breath we breathe 

Your great grace 

Same for the rich and poor 

Same for the saint and for the sinner 

Enough for this whole wide world 

Your great grace 

Oh, such grace 

From the creation to the cross 

Then from the cross into eternity 

Your grace finds me 

Yes, Your grace finds me 

There in the darkest night of the soul 

There in the sweetest songs of victory 

Your grace finds me 

Yes, Your grace finds me 

Your great grace 

Oh, such grace 

Your great grace 

Oh, such grace 

So I'm breathing in Your grace 

And I'm breathing out Your praise 

I'm breathing in Your grace 

Forever I'll be 

Breathing in Your grace 

And I'm breathing out Your praise 

I'm breathing in Your grace 

Forever I'll be 

Breathing in Your grace 

And I'm breathing out Your praise 

Breathing in Your grace 

For our God, for our God 

Yes, Your grace finds me 

Yes, Your grace finds me

Consecration

"It is the unexpected visitor (when he looked forward to a quiet evening), or the friend’s talkative wife (turning up when he looked forward to a tete-а-tete with the friend), that throw him out of gear. Now he is not yet so uncharitable or slothful that these small demands on his courtesy are in themselves too much for it. They anger him because he regards his time as his own and feels that it is being stolen. You must therefore zealously guard in his mind the curious assumption “My time is my own.”-Screwtape from C.S. Lewis' "The Screwtape Letters"

This was quoted today in our church meeting and it really touched my heart. So often I think of my time as my own, and find myself wasting it doing not bad things but not the best things (for me my addictions are facebook, and pinterest, and really the internet in general.) Sometimes I hate to admit but like this quote I get frustrated when I get interrupted from whatever I'm doing, feeling my time is being "stolen."

In reality, it's not my time. Each and every second is a gift from my Creator. And while I honestly think He wants me to be happy and enjoy my time, I also feel that there is so much more I could do with my time to show my gratitude for each day, and to show my gratitude for His sacrifice and His life that He has given so I can be saved. When I remember His sufferings, His devoted life, I wonder to myself how I could possibly use my time in any other way but to show love and devotion to Him.

In the scriptures we see Our Savior's consecration over and over again, as He says "Not my will, but thine (Luke 22:42)." He did "nothing save it be for the benefit of the world (2 Nephi 26:24). He consecrated His life to His Heavenly Father and to us. Because of His sacrifice, I can be clean and whole. Because of His sacrifice, I can have a peaceful heart, despite the troubles I may face. Because of His sacrifice, I can have the hope that I can be with Him and my wonderful family again for eternity. How I love Him. And how I want to give back to Him!

As I've pondered consecration today in my studied and thought about the talk that was given on giving our time to the Lord, I've come up with some ways that I personally want to show more devotion and love to Him and His children on earth. Here are my goals:

1. Live a life a service. Pray daily and seek opportunities to help anyone and everyone in my circle of influence. I have been given so much! I want to give back all  that I can.

2. Go to the temple more often. I am blessed to feel good and healthy and have a temple so close. I want to take more time to go and serve my Savior there more often.

3. Share the gospel. One of my past neighbors came up to me last night at an activity and was glowing. He told me he had been taking the missionary lessons and is getting baptized this week. He said it had been a rough thirty years of his life but now he finally felt peace. Melted my heart. And it made me realize, the gospel is another huge blessing in my life that can bless so many others. How can I not share it? 

4. Help others serve. I feel so blessed when I serve and even more blessed when I help others serve. This past Christmas I had my "warm blanket making night" and I realized that I love doing things with people, but I love serving with other people even more. I want to find and facilitate more opportunities to serve with people around me. 

5. Make time to study His Word. I know in doing so I know I can be better directed to know His will and how he wants me to spend my time. 

This are my goals to live a more consecrated life. What are yours?

The Precious Gift of Time

Today randomly I was cruising through Facebook and some how I came across a story of a woman who had been through incredible, difficult trials. Her parents got divorced while she was young, then she suffered long term sexual abuse from another family member, was raped as a teenager by a stranger, battled cervical cancer before she was out of her teens, grew more and more over weight with each of her pregnancies, got married and then divorced, and lost a daughter. My heart broke for her. Now she is doing amazing things working to empower other women. And all I could think of is, "What am I doing here, wasting my time on Facebook, when there is so much hurt in the world and so much healing needed. How can I waste any precious minute of my easy life, not helping others?"

Too often I look back on my day and wonder what in the world did I do all day? How did I just let 24 whole hours disappear? These thought of how I use my time make me reflect on the Savior and His use of time. The scripture that came to mind was this one:

2 Nephi 26:24
     "He (the Savior) doeth not anything save it be for the benefit of the world; for he loveth the world, even that he layeth down his own life that he may draw all men unto him. Wherefore he commandeth none that they shall not partake of his salvation."

How I love that verse! How clearly it shows to me that Christ lived a poured out life, 100%. Everything he did (and does) was for the "benefit of the world." Because he loves us that much. If I am to follow in His footsteps as my heart truly desires, I must look at my use of time and ask myself "Is what I'm doing for the benefit of His children?"

This doesn't mean I will no longer exercise or take time to get dressed in the morning. Christ too took his alone time and time to rejuvenate and be close to His Father. (Mark 6:47, Luke 9:18, Matt 4:1). Taking time to be with God and to take care of myself can help me better serve others as Christ did.

I love this invitation that was given in conference by my former mission president, Elder Ian S. Ardern:
    "I invite us to identify the time-wasting distractions in our lives that may need to be figuratively ground into dust. We will need to be wise in our judgment to ensure that the scales of time are correctly balanced to include the Lord, family, work, and wholesome recreational activities. As many have already discovered, there is an increase of happiness in life as we use our time to seek after those things which are “virtuous, lovely, or of good report or praiseworthy” (Articles of Faith 1:13)."
LInk to talk HERE.

 There are so many out there who need help. I have been given so many incredible blessings in my life, I must put aside my selfish, self-centered waste of time and focus on using my time as the Savior did: for the benefit of the world. I want to "grind into dust" those distractions that take me away from what matters most and from thinking and loving and serving others. I want to be a more careful steward of the precious gift of time I've been given.

Questions to think about:

• What are some specific ways the Savior spent His time that we can emulate?
• What are some of our own personal time-wasting distractions we can "grind into dust?" 

Modesty: A Christ-like Attribute

Modesty: A Christ-like Attribute

All the interesting thoughts, videos, and articles I’ve read and watched over the last few days on modesty have led me to think more deeply about the subject than I ever have. I chose to study modesty today as part of my study on Christ. Why? Because Christ is the utmost, perfect example of modesty.

Too often we limit the word “modesty” to mean something about how much skin we are or are not covering. The true meaning of modesty is summed up nicely in this definition:

“Modesty is an attitude of propriety and decency in dress, grooming, language, and behavior. If we are modest, we do not draw undue attention to ourselves. Instead, we seek to “glorify God in [our] body, and in [our] spirit” (1 Corinthians 6:20; see also 1 Corinthians 6:19).” (LDS.ORG)

To me, modesty means taking the focus off of ourselves and pointing to our Father in Heaven. Christ was the supreme of example of modesty, as we can see in the following scriptures:

·         Isaiah 53:2 He was nothing special outwardly, “no beauty that man would desire him”

·         Matt 11:29 Meek and lowly of heart

·         John 7:16,18 He seeks the glory of God, not His own glory

·         John 8:28-29, 50 He does nothing of Himself, He seeks not His own Glory

·         John 12:49-50 He speaks only what the Father speaks

·         Often says to those He heals “Thy Faith has made thee whole” taking the focus from Him to the faith of the one he healed

·         Mark 1:44 Told one man he healed to tell no one

·         John 6:15 Refused to be king

·         Born of humble, modest, circumstances

As part of all my ponderings on modesty, one of my questions I asked myself is: “Is modesty an eternal principle or something just for this life?” My conclusion is that the doctrine of modesty (giving glory to God or others rather than self) IS an eternal unchanging doctrine, which Christ modeled perfectly. However the APPLICATION of how we are modest changes throughout time. For example, in the New Testament there are some interesting scriptures on how braiding hair or wearing gold or pearls are not modest behaviors (1 Peter 3:3, 1 Cor 11:15, 1 Tim 2:9). Now, these things are perfectly acceptable and are not considered immodest at all.  This shows that the application of modesty has changed throughout time, though the doctrine of not drawing undue attention to yourself has stayed the same.

Our culture is always shifting and changing through time. That is why I am so grateful for the spirit and modern day prophets and apostles who help us navigate how to live doctrines in the applicable settings of our time and in our individual lives. Because society changes, application of doctrine may change, and the leaders and the spirit can help us know how we can best live the pure doctrines of Christ in our day and age.

My last question I asked myself was “How will I teach my children about modesty?” Here are my conclusions:

1.       First, I will teach them that they are 100% responsible for their own thoughts and actions. The can blame NO ONE for the mistakes they make.

2.       I will teach them, and strive myself, to have a love and devotion to the Savior. I will teach them of His love for us, and His desire for us to follow him in all things, including being modest. I will strive myself and strive to help them come to love and follow the Savior and His humble example.

3.       I will teach them to understand that every person is on a different path in life and some may struggle more with certain temptations than others, and we are not to judge who struggles and who doesn’t. I will teach them that salvation is a joint effort and love for all people is necessary to follow the Savior. Therefore, I will teach them that dressing modestly as an act of love for those who may struggle does not mean that they are in anyway responsible for the actions or thoughts of others, but that it is indeed an act of love.

4.       I will teach them to love and see people as PEOPLE and not define them, objectify them, or fear them because of what they wear. I will teach them that “Perfect love casteth out all fear” (1 John 4:18).

 

For me it all comes down to love. Love and devotion to the Savior, and love for others. When I worry what and how to teach my children, I remember “charity never faileth” (Moroni 7:46) and that if I have the Lord on my side and the spirit in my heart, I know He will guide me.